On January 16, 2015, my grandma passed away. She was 96 years old. In December, she fell and fractured her hip in two places. The fractures weren't minor enough to leave alone and if she didn't have the surgery, she would most likely become bed-ridden. My grandma had always been really active--she couldn't sit still and it seemed like she needed to be doing something, so that would never fly. Despite her advanced age, and her heart issues, my uncles (her sons) and my grandma felt that they would go through with a hip-pinning procedure. I was anxious the whole time, because I personally thought she was too frail to survive, but she was very strong and the surgery went very smoothly. Unfortunately, while she was rehabbing in the hospital, she contracted the flu and then pneumonia, which she could never really shake. The rehabilitation had been progressing, and at one point, we thought that she would be home for the SuperBowl. But it was not to be.I visited her at the hospital whenever I could. I was fortunate that I had a couple of weeks vacation in December, so I spent many hours there with her. We even had Christmas Dinner and New Year's lunch with her in her hospital room. And when I went back to work after my vacation was up, I still visited her almost every evening. But then I got sick and couldn't go for awhile...so the last time I saw her was the day she passed. At that point, she was made "comfortable". Grandma just looked like she was sleeping.
We had Grandma's funeral yesterday. It was a really nice service, but what I didn't appreciate was the lecture the Buddhist minister gave us. He pretty much told us that we were doing it wrong. According to the Buddhist faith, when a person passes away, that is considered the 1st day. And then every seven days, the family needs to hold a service for the next seven weeks. This 49-day period is the amount of time the departed's spirit is undergoing training to attain the enlightened status that the Buddha achieved. Each seven week's service is to encourage the departed to strive hard. And the 49-day service is the most important one. My grandparents were devout Buddhists, but the later generations, are less so. Some of my relatives have converted to Christianity, while I don't belong to any particular faith. I'm still exploring. We uphold the Buddhist traditions as best as we can, but it was really very uncomfortable to have been lectured like that. That was the only part about the funeral service that made me upset. I think that my grandma really would have enjoyed seeing her family gathered together like that--I haven't seen some of my cousins in a long time since we're all pretty much spread out across the country.
So that is mostly why I've not posted anything in a long time. It's just really hard to believe that my grandma is no longer here. She's been a huge part of my life, every Friday evening we'd go to her house and I'd cook something or order food from a restaurant and we'd have dinner together--Grandma, me, the Husband and my two kids. Thanksgiving was always at her house. And Superbowl. It was the gathering place for the whole family and it sucks that she's gone now.
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