Farewell, Grandma

This is one of my favorite photos of my grandma. I love how tough and sassy she looks. On January 16, 2015, my grandma passed away.  She was 96 years old.  In December, she fell and fractured her hip in two places.  The fractures weren't minor enough to leave alone and if she didn't have the surgery, she would most likely become bed-ridden.  My grandma had always been really active--she couldn't sit still and it seemed like she needed to be doing something, so that would never fly.  Despite her advanced age, and her heart issues, my uncles (her sons) and my grandma felt that they would go through with a hip-pinning procedure.  I was anxious the whole time, because I personally thought she was too frail to survive, but she was very strong and the surgery went very smoothly.  Unfortunately, while she was rehabbing in the hospital, she contracted the flu and then pneumonia, which she could never really shake.  The rehabilitation had been progressing, and at one point, we thought that she would be home for the SuperBowl.  But it was not to be.

I visited her at the hospital whenever I could.  I was fortunate that I had a couple of weeks vacation in December, so I spent many hours there with her.  We even had Christmas Dinner and New Year's lunch with her in her hospital room.  And when I went back to work after my vacation was up, I still visited her almost every evening.  But then I got sick and couldn't go for awhile...so the last time I saw her was the day she passed.  At that point, she was made "comfortable".  Grandma just looked like she was sleeping.

We had Grandma's funeral yesterday.  It was a really nice service, but what I didn't appreciate was the lecture the Buddhist minister gave us.  He pretty much told us that we were doing it wrong.  According to the Buddhist faith, when a person passes away, that is considered the 1st day.  And then every seven days, the family needs to hold a service for the next seven weeks.  This 49-day period is the amount of time the departed's spirit is undergoing training to attain the enlightened status that the Buddha achieved.  Each seven week's service is to encourage the departed to strive hard.  And the 49-day service is the most important one.  My grandparents were devout Buddhists, but the later generations, are less so.  Some of my relatives have converted to Christianity, while I don't belong to any particular faith.  I'm still exploring.  We uphold the Buddhist traditions as best as we can, but it was really very uncomfortable to have been lectured like that.  That was the only part about the funeral service that made me upset.  I think that my grandma really would have enjoyed seeing her family gathered together like that--I haven't seen some of my cousins in a long time since we're all pretty much spread out across the country.

So that is mostly why I've not posted anything in a long time.  It's just really hard to believe that my grandma is no longer here.  She's been a huge part of my life, every Friday evening we'd go to her house and I'd cook something or order food from a restaurant and we'd have dinner together--Grandma, me, the Husband and my two kids.  Thanksgiving was always at her house.  And Superbowl.  It was the gathering place for the whole family and it sucks that she's gone now.

Happy 2015!

Another year begins.  While I wasn't as active in writing blog entries as I liked in 2014, at least I haven't abandoned it entirely.  An occasional post is better than none at all.  I'll strive to continue to write a bit in this new year.

Being that it is January, I'm going to start with some things that I hope to focus on.  They are almost like resolutions, I suppose, but if I don't call them resolutions, I believe I'll be more apt to stick to them.  It's something psychological, obviously.

THINGS I'D LIKE TO FOCUS ON THIS YEAR

• Health.  I bought myself a FitBit One last month.  It's more to help me get an idea of how many steps I'm taking during the day, and how many flights of stairs I climb, and keep track of the hours I sleep at night.  I have the apps downloaded to my phone and ipad, so it's very convenient for me to get a good picture of the restless sleep I have during the night.  The app makes it easy for me to set silent alarms so that I wake only myself up and not my entire household.  It's also very easy to log the glasses of water drunk throughout the day, and keep track of calories.  It's like a food journal, but done on an app.  I already keep a food diary--an actual notebook that I jot down the stuff I eat--so it should be pretty convenient to transition over, I just haven't really done that yet.  The holidays (starting right around Halloween and continuing into the New Year festivities) really do a number on me with fewer hours of sleep, unhealthy eating and indulging, and more alcohol intake that I normally allow myself.  I'm looking to get back on track now that the holidays are over. I would like to decrease my weight a little--I still play the WiiFit Plus on my Nintendo Wii, and I'm a little tired of the Wii board kinda groaning when I step on it!  How rude.
• Family.  My children bicker all the time.  My older son has a short fuse and gets irritated rather quickly.  My daughter likes to bait him and then usually he lashes out at her.  It gets to the point that I get grouchy and I yell at them.  I hope to do less yelling at them...they are siblings and that's what siblings do.  They argue.  They irk each other.  I remember fighting with my sister when we were kids, and my parents used to yell at me.  I guess that's why I yell at my kids--it's learned behavior.  I hope to try to get them to try to get along more because  when I'm gone and my husband is gone, the only immediate family they will have are each other, and it would be nice for my two kids to have a harmonious relationship rather than one mired in hostility.  I also need to appreciate more what my husband does around the house rather than zero in on what he doesn't do or does wrong.
• Finances.  Life is just expensive.  Just when I think I have a handle on things, emergencies pop up!  I would like to commit to spending less money where I can.  It's really hard to live within one's means when the cost of living just keeps going up and my pay doesn't keep pace with it.  I was really proud that I paid off my monthly credit card balances each month on time in 2014.  I hope to continue to do so this year as well, and hopefully just use the plastic a little bit less to keep my balances from going sky-high!
• Doll Hobby.  I keep telling myself that I'm done with adding to my doll family, but I just don't think that is true.  The most I can do is slow down the rate of growth and thin the herd when it gets to be too much.  In 2014, I had a list of things I was allowed to spend my money on, and I stuck to it for the most part.  I had a few setbacks and impulse purchases, but it happens to the best of us, right?  Here are my doll-hobby items to focus on for 2015.

1. Blythe Doll to be customized by BuzzingBumblebee/Bee's Dreamland.  I keep trying to find a decently priced second-hand Blythe doll to be used as the base.  I'm not interested in TBL/fake/factory/knockoff Blythe dolls, so this is harder than it seems.  The Blythe hobby is so inundated with non-genuine Blythes and there is such a casual attitude towards them that finding the real deal is challengine.  I find some on ebay and then I get outbid at the last minute.  It's very frustrating. 
2. Isul Doll.  One of the rules for my collection is that each one of my dolls must have a counterpart.  So my Pullip : Taeyang and Dal : Isul ratios must be equal.  I have an unpartnered Dal and it's making me twitchy.  I already have an idea of which Isul to get (Light).  Ideally, I'd like to find a split partner for the stock, but that hasn't happened yet.  If the MIO Isul kits come out sooner rather than later, I'll probably give up on Isul Light and just get an MIO and find someone to give him a pretty face.
3. Get MIO Taeyang completed.  I have a MIO Taeyang for Mokka, my single custom Pullip.  Nanami the Veritas was fine with sharing her boyfriend with her but she finally said "Enough is enough.  You have to get your own man."  So Mokka's Christmas wish for a Taeyang of her own will come true...just late.  I'm sending the Taeyang for a face-up this week, but he still requires a wig. 
4. Obitsu bodies.  I need two obitsu bodies--one 27cm for my Pullip who is currently on a plastic BJD body and one 21cm body for Misa the DRTA.
5. Stay out of the BST/Marketplace areas unless it's to sell/downsize.  A really bad habit of mine is window-shopping.  If I don't go to the mall, I don't see all these fancy things that tempt me.  It's the same with the BST/Marketplace.  If I don't browse the listings, I won't get tempted and suckered into buying cool stuff that I want but definitely don't need.
6. Wrap up the cabochon eye business.  As fun as that was, I think the time has come to stop.  I still may make the eyes to donate to PUDDLE and for my own personal use, but as far as selling them and filling orders, 2015 will be the last year for that.  I intend to close up my etsy shop at the end of November at the latest.  It's not like there aren't tons of other crafters who do cabochon eyes--people can still get their eyes from other places.